Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Para sa mga Pinoy! Istorya ni inday, dakilang alalay!

Dahil sa tindi ng kahirapan sa
probinsya, namasukan si Inday bilang
katulong sa Maynila. Habang ini-interview ng amo...

Amo: Kelangan namin ng katulong para
mag ayos ng bahay, magluto,maglaba, magplantsa, mamalengke, at
magbantay ng mga bata. Kaya mo ba ang lahat ng ito?

Inday: I believe that my trained
skills and expertise in management with
the use of standard tools, and my
discipline and experience will
contribute significantly to the value
of the work that you want, my
creativity, productivity and work-
efficiency and the high quality of
outcomes I can offer will boost the
work progress.

Amo : [nosebleed]

Nakaraan ang dalawang araw, umuwi ang
amo, nakitang me bukol si junior.

Amo: Bakit me bukol si junior?

Inday: Compromising safety with
useless aesthetics, the not-so-well
engineered architectural design of our
kitchen lavatory affected the
boy's cranium with a slight boil at
the left temple near the auditory
organ.

Amo: [nosebleed ulit]

Kinagabihan, habang naghahapunan.

Amo: Bakit maalat ang ulam?

Inday: The consistency was fine. But
you see, it seems that the increased amount of sodium chloride
(NaCl) affected the taste drastically and those actions are
irreversible. I do apologize.

Amo: [nosebleed na naman]

Donya: Bakit tuwing paguwi ko,
nadadatnan kitang nanunuod ng tv?!

Inday: Because I don't want you to see
me doing absolutely nothing.

Donya: [hinimatay]

Kinabukasan, sinamahan ni Inday si
junior sa principal's office dahil
di makapunta ang amo at donya.

Principal: Sinuntok ni junior ang
kanyang kaklase.

Inday: It's absurd! It was never a fact that he will
inflict a fight.I can only imagine how you handle
schizophrenic kids on this educational institution. Revise your
policies because they suck!

Principal: [nag resign]

Pag dating sa bahay, nandun na ang
amo, galit na galit.

Amo: Inday, bakit nagkalat ang basura
sa likod ng bahay?!

Inday: A change in the weather
patterns might have occurred wrecking
havoc to the surroundings. The way the
debris are scattered indicat es that the gust of wind was
going northeast causing damage to the path it was heading for.

Amo: [nosebleed ulit]

Habang nagluluto si Inday ng hapunan,
malikot si junior.

Inday : Stop your raucous behavior. It is bound to result in property
damages and if that happens there will be corresponding punishment to be
inflicted upon you!

Junior: [takbo sa CR, punasan ang
nagdudugong ilong]


Pagkatapos magluto, nanood na ng TV si
Inday. Nabalitaan nya umalis si
Angel Locsin sa GMA 7.

Junior: Bakit kaya sya umalis?

Inday: Sometimes, people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons
but because they just know that things will get worse if they'll stay.
Leaving can be a tough act, and it's harder when people can't understand
you for doing so.

Junior: [tuloy ang pagdugo ng ilong]

Nung gabing yon, me nag text ke Inday. Si Dodong, ang driver ng
kapitbahay, gusto maki pag text-mate.

Inday: To forestall further hopes of acquaintance, my unfathomable
stat ement to the denial of your request - Petition denied.

Di nagla-on, dahil sa tyaga ni Dodong, nagging syota nya rin si Inday.
Pero di tumagal ang kanilang relasyon, at nakipag-break si Inday ke
Dodong.

Inday: The statute restricts me to love you but you have the
provocations. The way you smile is the proximate cause why I love you.
We have some rules to think of. We have no vested rights to love each
other because the upper household dismissed my petition!"

Dodong : Perhaps you are mistaken, what you seem to contrive as any
affections for you are somewhat half-hearted. I was merely attempting to
expand my network of interests by involving you in my daily recreation.
Hereto for, you can expect an end to any verbal articulation from myself"

Me dumaan na mamang basurero, at
narinig ang usapan ni Inday at Dodong.

Basurero (sabi ke Inday): Be careful in letting go of the things you
thought are just nothing because maybe someday you'll realize that the
one you gave away is the very thing you've been wishing for to stay.

******** ITO NA UNG UPDATE *********

Narinig ang lahat ng eto ng amo ni
inday.

Amo: Mula ngayon, walang magsasalita ng ingles, sinumang magpadugo ng ilong
ko at sa anak ko, palalayasin sa pamamahay na ito.

Inday: Ang namutawi sa inyong labi ay mataman ko pong iimbak sa sulok ng
aking balintataw, kaibuturan ng aking puso, gugunam- gunamin. Sakbibi ng
madlang lumbay kung mapapaalis sa gunita yaring tinuran.

Amo: Leche, di kami sinauna!!! Yung
makabago ang gusto ko !!

Inday: Tarush! Pachenes pa tong chorva eklavuboo chuva tabayishki kun
suplandish ...:)

Amo: [ nagpakamatay]

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